Friday, October 26, 2018

The Doctor Conversations


This was about few months ago. My daughter was having cough cold fever. We did the usual- visited the paediatrician, took medicines , and in 2-3 days again the sneezing and cough was recurring.  This continued even once more. I understand that with a 2.5 year old kid all this is seasonal. But understanding this fact and dealing when this happens to your own child are entirely two different things. We decided to consult another paediatrician. He is very renowned one and very experienced in his field, and he also happened to be the father of my gynaecologist. I went there and narrated all what my daughter was suffering from. As I narrated all this, I was in tears. I was not able to see my daughter constantly suffering from cold and was crying at my utter helplessness at improving her situation. Maybe a cold is nothing major. But to see your 2.5 year old coughing, her eyes watering and sneezing for days together was major for me. Still in tears, I asked the doctor was I doing anything wrong. Am I taking good enough care of my daughter?He first calmed me down. He told me there is nothing to worry. Sometimes colds do take long to recover. The tone of his voice was so reassuring that it is impossible to explain in words. He addressed all my concerns even before I could ask them to him. He told me to go home and not worry.

A few weeks back my daughter was sick just 3 days before her annual day. All of a sudden she developed cough and fever. I went to the same doctor and told him that it's best if she gets well before her annual day. I was a bit concerned about this sudden fever this time. Again , in his reassuring tone he assured me that she will be all well and be able to attend her annual day.

Maybe all doctors do tell their patients that they will get well. But there is something different about some doctors, that they are able to understand your concerns and empathetically address them. That you can have a conversation at ease with them. That they don't show an eyebrow when you ask some questions.

I experienced this many times.  Truly empathetic doctors do make a great difference to the patient. When my daughter was born 3.5 years ago, my doctor would visit me post the delivery and every single time she would  help me breastfeed my daughter. I had no such problems feeding. But in the first 2 days, my daughter was sleeping so much that it was necessary to wake her up so that she gets fed. My doctor would do this when she came for her visit. She would instruct the nurses to help me breastfeed and had her full attention on me as her patient.

A good diagnosis definitely makes a good doctor. But in this age where a patient is reduced to a series of medical reports, doctors that try to understand the patient as a human is a valuable breed. To understand a patient, to go into his shoes and see what he might be going through and patiently explaining that is a skill. It is a skill that for me makes such a person a best doctor.

-Dhanashree

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