We decided it was long since we went on a date. The husband and I were longing for some couple only time and made a plan last night for a dinner date. I convinced my daughter 'S' that I will have to go out with her Dad for some work. I also convinced myself that I need to have these 'me' times for myself as well the relationship with my husband.
Then 'S' cried as usual. She wanted to go out with us. After a lot of convincing she agreed to stay back. So now we were all set for our date. Physically fatigued after a long day but mentally enthusiastic, I dressed up and the husband and I went to our favourite restaurant. We discussed our old times, the college days, the CAT prep, the MBA times and what not. We discussed how my husband asked me out and the times after that. In all this romantic mood there was an antenna in my mind thinking about little 'S' and what she must be doing.
Once we got done with food, we just walked around the place. We could see couples, families around. Kids running around and parents trying to run behind them. Whenever I saw kids , all I felt was I missed my daughter even more. Here I was on a dinner date with my husband which was long due, possibly trying to have my 'me' time, but the mother in me could not switch off. All she thought of was "What is S doing?". All she felt was she missed her.
Times like this make me realise that once you are a mother, having 'me' time also can feel like a burden. As much as you want the 'me' time, you also want to be with your little one. Thats why probably once a child is born, your most known identity is as the mother of your child.
Whether you are working or stay at home, once you have a child, one part of you always thinks of her. Hence there will never be an easy answer to - To "me time" or not to "me time"?
Because I am and will always be my daughter's mum indeed! (http://dsaidso.blogspot.com/2017/11/i-am-my-daughters-mum.html?m=1 )
-Dhanashree
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